Speaking of "shoulds"...
I find it interesting that the general consensus on this thread is that it's perfectly normal for dating to change your behavior (well, aside from AfterBurn). Yet over on the other related thread (
http://www.tfproject.org/tfp/showthr...threadid=40613) people are just as adamant that while it's ok to ask for advice, you should definitely make your own decisions.
Which is where the issue comes in. Problem is, even the most compatible relationship is still going to have a few areas of conflict. Sometimes you're faced with the choice between hurting and possibly losing someone you love, and betraying a part of yourself. While I think it's natural to change minor aspects of yourself when you're dating someone, it's critical not to change anything you know you'll regret later. If the person you are now would be horrified with the person you'd become if you change yourself, don't. Sounds obvious, sure, but that can be a lot harder to see if you're in the middle of that kind of conflict and not seeing how any good can come for either one of you if you do lose your s.o.
In the end it's a cost-benefit analysis, but people can be all too good at rationalizing. Sometimes the only answer is to trust your gut.