I would like to think that being in a relationship should change people's behavior. After all, when you're not in a relationship, then your only obligation is to look out for your own best interests.
But being in a relationship brings with it the obligation to take your partner into account, to determine how your actions (or inaction) will effect the other person. If for some reason this isn't happening, then I really couldn't hold out much hope for the survivability of it all.
This does not mean that there should be an effort made to change what makes a person fundamentally unique. You don't like certain things about your partner? Either learn to love these little "quirks" or else re-think your compatibility.
But, as always, it's just IMHO.
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