If he is gay, and if his family is having a hard time accepting it, then what he needs most is unconditional support from others who are important to him. Quit being scared by him and how different he is, and just accept him for who he is. I don't think it's your place to hammer home to his family that he might be gay - the kid's only 12, for chrissake. When the time comes, if they have a problem with it, he's going to need people he can count on to talk to. If you really care about him, make sure he has someone like that - even if it's not you.
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"If ten million people believe a foolish thing, it is still a foolish thing."
- Anatole France
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