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lightning · 12-31-2003, 07:08 AM

Really what isn't being said is that this is a really big opportunity to see what you’re made of.

First, just because you date this girl doesn't mean you are gonna hurt her or do her wrong... Only you know your real intentions.
(if you really can have some feelings for her this can be good, if this is just gonna be a fling it's real dangerous)

Second, the character you show here is gonna define you professionally in this company. If you treat this girl right no matter what, you will enhance your prestige with your boss and co-workers, and show some stones. It makes your way up move a lot faster.
(don't do this for your career though because it'll blow up in your face in a big way)

Third, it seems that virtually nobody has thought about what will happen if she gives you the shaft... Yes, women do that sometimes... There have been guys that couldn't handle the break up of a relationship and freaked out. Even a little freakage is gonna look way bad for you. (I mean: you can't call over and over when she doesn't want to talk to you, you can't just show up at her house, you can’t argue around her family, you can't talk to her folks ie. your boss and his wife about any fact, true or perceived, regarding you relationship, etc... If so this will certainly hurt your status with your boss and co-workers)

Basically, what I'm saying is if you do the right thing this probably won't hurt you. In fact, if you are the kind of man who can do the right thing, this will be known and valued by everyone involved. If you aren't they'll find out anyway, but you shouldn't give any bullets to shoot you with.

You might as well try the ancient approach and ask the dad if it is okay for you to ask out his daughter. He will certainly think more of you for this and he will tell you where the landmines are. But, be ready to hear the truth. If he tells you no, you gotta live with it, he’ll be twice as pissed if you go against him and do it anyway.

If everyone involved is an adult here and acts like it, you should have no worries... however, there are lots of people who can't act like adults in this world. Just be sure you know what YOU are doing.

Good luck.

12-31-2003, 07:08 AM	#42 (permalink)
lightning Tilted Location: Texas	Really what isn't being said is that this is a really big opportunity to see what you’re made of. First, just because you date this girl doesn't mean you are gonna hurt her or do her wrong... Only you know your real intentions. (if you really can have some feelings for her this can be good, if this is just gonna be a fling it's real dangerous) Second, the character you show here is gonna define you professionally in this company. If you treat this girl right no matter what, you will enhance your prestige with your boss and co-workers, and show some stones. It makes your way up move a lot faster. (don't do this for your career though because it'll blow up in your face in a big way) Third, it seems that virtually nobody has thought about what will happen if she gives you the shaft... Yes, women do that sometimes... There have been guys that couldn't handle the break up of a relationship and freaked out. Even a little freakage is gonna look way bad for you. (I mean: you can't call over and over when she doesn't want to talk to you, you can't just show up at her house, you can’t argue around her family, you can't talk to her folks ie. your boss and his wife about any fact, true or perceived, regarding you relationship, etc... If so this will certainly hurt your status with your boss and co-workers) Basically, what I'm saying is if you do the right thing this probably won't hurt you. In fact, if you are the kind of man who can do the right thing, this will be known and valued by everyone involved. If you aren't they'll find out anyway, but you shouldn't give any bullets to shoot you with. You might as well try the ancient approach and ask the dad if it is okay for you to ask out his daughter. He will certainly think more of you for this and he will tell you where the landmines are. But, be ready to hear the truth. If he tells you no, you gotta live with it, he’ll be twice as pissed if you go against him and do it anyway. If everyone involved is an adult here and acts like it, you should have no worries... however, there are lots of people who can't act like adults in this world. Just be sure you know what YOU are doing. Good luck. Last edited by lightning; 12-31-2003 at 07:16 AM..