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The first thing I said after reading this was "Wow...this is....impossible." And I stand by that.
There is no "good" solution to this problem. You must understand that. There is no way to make everyone happy here. SOMEONE will be hurt.
All I can do is tell you how much I agree with the previous poster. It's YOUR decision to make. I'm sure it hurts to see your mother feeling such sadness, but it's not your responsibility to make her happy. It is, first and foremost, your responsibility to make YOURSELF happy, so long as it is in a just manner. And from what I gather, you don't believe your relationship with Emily is unjust and, therefore, you have nothing to be ashamed about with it. Even if it causes your mother to be unhappy.
I'm going to be honest and tell you, I'm not so sure your mother is capable of ever moving on from this if you choose to stay with Emily. When it's such a fundamental belief as to be part of her religion and to effect her this much, chances are that she will never come completely to terms with it. But she may grow to tolerate it more over time. Nonetheless, you should do what's best for YOU. And if staying with Emily is what you feel is best for your happiness, then I think that's the right choice. Just be prepared that there are consequences no matter what you choose.
And good luck, I'm sure this is an EXTREMELY hard position to be in.
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Le temps détruit tout
"Musicians are the carriers and communicators of spirit in the most immediate sense." - Kurt Elling
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