The suggestions above are really great. Go ahead and do something special. Even getting a Christmas wreath for the door (if you don't have one already) or stringing some Christmas lights around your bedroom, lighting some candles, and have some treat to nibble on. Also put on some traditional Christmas music maybe. Personally the Christmas music I enjoy is the Bing Crosby and such. There isn't anything like a real nice "White Christmas" Don't know if that's the kind that floats her boat but I doubt it would be as obnoxious to you as Jewel. The setup at home after work would be less expensive. Hubby and I understand the cost factor. Also make sure you have a CD of some Christmas music that you can tolerate in the car with you when you go with her anyway. When she puts in something that bothers you like Jewel you can suggest she listen to this other Christmas music. Then you can show her that it's the type of music that partly bothers you.
Personally I think she needs to stop worrying about your mood. She isn't something you can change I realize but I wanted to tell you that this blow up isn't all you. Over the years hubby and I have learned to let be usually. Yes we give and take but also we give each other the space we need to be in the moods that we happen to be in. For example: Hubby went through some depression due to his injury 2 years ago. I learned to let him be, Not try to cheer him up, and do what I needed to keep my own mood happy. I've learned that my mood does not have to be dependant on his. I'm my own person and can be happy, do happy things even when he's feeling down. When I take care of that then when he needs a shoulder to lean on or someone to hear him out then I'm there and ready. I don't know how you'd communicate any of this to her but I hope she can learn the same thing I did.
Good Luck and I hope you can find something to enjoy about this season. Don't let your past unpleasantness your parents caused you to experience to ruin this Christmas and all future Christmases. They are still ruining it for you and it doesn't have to be that way.
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"Always learn the rules so that you can break them properly." Dalai Lama
My Karma just ran over your Dogma.
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