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I think that the only time porn becomes really, truly disrespectful is when it is used as a substitute. I don't like it, I don't appreciate it, I have no use for it. But that doesn't mean that I would tell my SO to stay the hell away from it. It's more about open communication. If they know that you're really truly uneasy with it and they SAY they'll stop and DON'T, or they hide it from you and you find out, that's when it is disrespectful. (hypothetically ---> ) I'd rather know that my SO looked at porn in a 'healthy' manner, and just not want to participate in it myself, than find out during our relationship that he was hiding it from me all along. If you're hiding something from someone just because you don't want them to find out (or for a similar reason), then it gives off the vibe that you think it's bad and just don't want to deal with it. But if it's communicated openly, and I know about it and just don't care to join in the 'fun', fine. Whatever. At least it doesn't make me feel insecure (so much). To me, if it's being hidden, it's made to seem like it's a bad thing. And that's how it is with most things in life, not just porn.
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Anyone can be passionate, but it takes real lovers to be silly-Rose Franken
.... absence makes me miss him more...
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