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i guess it would depend on the condition of your relationship, i.e. it's been a long one or not. you want to get to the point where you don't need to wonder whether or not she will want sex, you will just know. and when you can tell that she isn't interested in going all the way (as opposed to lot's of kissing and stuff). But as a rule, i would't ask for sex. i agree with acting like you are doing her a favor, because you should be. never go into sex with a selfish attitude.
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