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South Park Christmas Classics
"The Most Offensive Song Ever"
Don't read this if you're easily offended about religion.
Mods, if this in inappropriate I'm sorry.
These are the uneditted lyrics, including what Kenny says.
The Virgin Mary was sleeping
When Angel Gabriel appeared.
He said, "You are to be the Virgin Mother."
But Mary thought that was weird.
Mary said, "I'm not a virgin,
I blew a guy last year."
But then Gabriel said to Mary,
"My child, have no fear.
For you can suck all the dick you want and still be a virgin, Mary.
You can suck all the dick you want, and still not be considered flawed.
Although you went to town
And sucked some semen down
You're still a virgin in the eyes of God."
There was no room at the inn
When Mary and Joseph did arrive.
But they were so very tired you see
And Mary had to offer a bribe.
She said she had no money.
How would she pay for a place to sleep?
Gabriel appeared to Mary
And told her not to weep.
"'Cause you can suck all the dick you want and still be a virgin, Mary.
You can suck all the dick you want and still be the mother of Christ.
If there's no room at the inn
Then it's not considered a sin
To suck some dick to get a room for the night."
Then three wise men did appear
Bearing gifts of myrrh and such.
They said that they had followed a star
And missed a woman's touch.
Mary thought she might pleasure them
But could not take them to bed.
But again Gabriel appeared to her,
And this is what he said:
"You can suck all the dick you want and still be a virgin, Mary.
You can suck all the dick you want. Everyone that hangs in the nation.
Felatio ain't no sin.
Go and blow those three wise men
And you'll still be a virgin because there was no penetration."
So you can suck all the dick you want and still be a virgin, Mary.
The donkey and the ox and the lambs and even the little drummer boy.
People will remember your name quick.
They'll say, "Damn, that bitch can suck a good dick."
Because sucking dick brings peace on earth and joy.
'Cause sucking dick brings peace on earth and joy.
(Mary, Mary suck that dick!)
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