Dude, I hate to be the one to say this, but from your posts, it looks like you're pretty set in what you want to do. Someone else has said this, but I'll put it differently, "Once a cheater, always a cheater". Do you think what she is doing is cheating, or not? Even though you haven't had anything physical, it sounds like given the opportunity, you will!
If things aren't right in her relationship with her husband, suggest counseling. She needs help, and not from you. Yes you think you love her, but do you really? She needs help, period.
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