She obviously has issues and those aren't going to stop by being with you. Those issues are what contribute to her doing all this behind her husband's back and they will contribute to her being able to do it behind yours. She has known chaos all her life and doesn't know how to leave it - thus she seems to be creating it.
And to finish off my armchair psychologist post, do you have a history of dating/falling in love with people with a history of abuse of some sort or abandonment? Perhaps you may be a bit co-dependant.
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Le temps détruit tout
"Musicians are the carriers and communicators of spirit in the most immediate sense." - Kurt Elling
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