Anyhow, to update everybody, I have been talking to the last girl I got her number (the last one of the 3 friends that I posted about previously) and each time I have talked to her, the conversation was going very well and she was into it.. this is when I told her I had to go. She keeps calling
. This girl is a keeper... an artist who graduated from Michigain State and moved down to Orange County a few months ago. She has a nice job, owns her own house, and is un-fucking believably great looking. She could pretty much get whoever she wants, but she is interested in me... why? Well, because I have made it seem that I "might" not be intersted in her, and that is the key.
Anyhow that reminds me of when I broke up with my last girlfriend and had to remind myself of how to talk conversate with women to keep them seeing me as the dominant one and not some weak guy who just got dumped on. Anyhow it made me want to give another lesson on conversation:
Nouning
This is a technique I read about that will help those of you who have trouble with conversation. You’ll be able to hold a conversation without a problem. It could start with the simplest of questions like, “What did you do today?” You’ll learn to do this with practice without even thinking about it, but for now, here’s how you do it. (this is taken from another post)
quote:You: So what do you do with yourself?
Her: Oh, Im in Trinity College in Dublin studying Law.
Take the nouns out of this reply... (Noun: a person place or thing!)
3 Nouns in her reply:
1- Trinity College
2- Dublin
3- Law
Pick any of these and ask her a question about it! Let's say you pick 'Dublin':
You: Dublin eh? So what do ya think of the place?
OR
You: So what's the nightlife like up there?
Or if you chose 'Law':
You: So what made you choose to do Law? Is it tough?
Then she'll answer with something like:
Her: (In regard to 'Dublin' nightlife) Yeah the nightlife's excellent, especially Club Spirit. Although it can be pretty rough after the clubs close, especially in Grafton Street!
Now repeat the process, taking out the nouns and asking her questions about them.
Nouns in the previous answer: Club Spirit, Grafton Street.
Make sense? This is an easy way to keep the conversation flowing from what she just told you. I’d suggest you go out to coffee with a friend that you don’t know very well and see if you can keep the conversation going using this technique.
6. Use Open-Ended Questions
Open-ended questions are questions that require more than a yes or no answer, and they easily lead to more conversation. Examples:
What are you studying?
What did you do today?
How was…?
What are your thoughts on…?
What’s your stance on…? (to get her opinion on something)
What do you like about…?
What do you think about…?
7. Men want facts; women want feelings
This of course is a generalization that I read somewhere: Men like to cut to the facts. They don’t like all the small talk and stuff in between. Men organize thoughts in their head and then say what needs to be said. Women use talking as a means to organize their thoughts.
Women also like to talk about feelings and how something makes them feel. The feelings associated with things. Have you ever talked to a girl for months, but the conversations were just based on facts, so you never really got to know the girl? What you want to do is take any facts she gives you, and dig deeper to get to feelings.
Girl: I really like Brad Pitt.
Guy: What is it about him that you like?
Girl: Well he’s got a great sense of style. He pulls off different looks and they all work for him. He seems really confident and…
You want to get her to expand on her original thought. Let her talk but make sure you’re controlling where the conversation is going. Never let the conversation go out of your control!
8. Listen to Her!
I’m sure you’ve all heard girls complain about guys that don’t listen. If you ask the girl the proper questions and just sit back and listen, she’ll tell you exactly how to seduce her. She’ll tell you what she looks for, what she likes, and what she doesn’t like. You guide the conversation then use this so you know what she wants to hear and how she wants to hear it. If any of you have ever done sales, you’ll know what I’m talking about. Always let the customer talk first and they’ll tell you what they want to hear.
Girls like guys who can keep them interested. Try to keep the conversation different. Take risks. Talk to her about stuff other guys usually wouldn’t; you’ll stick in her mind. Watch the news so you know what’s going on in the world. You can use that to get opinions out of her if you need something to talk about.
One more technique, which is a little more advanced, is using statements instead of questions. This isn’t to carry a conversation, it’s just a technique you can use to change things up a bit and display a lot of confidence.
Are you tired of meeting weird guys?
=> You must be tired of meeting weird guys.
What school do you go to?
=> So tell me what school you’re from
How was your day?
=> Tell me about your day
They usually start with
"So...", "Then..."
"You must..."
"You could..."
"It must be..."
Statements they take a position and a risk. If you say, “I prefer dogs”, you’re taking a risk. She might prefer cats. Saying, “I’m not interested in a long term relationship right now” is taking a risk.
Making these statements shows her your courage and confidence instead of being a guy who sits back and asks safe questions. It also gives you more control because you’re telling her to tell you something, not asking her nicely (but stating it isn’t rude either).
You don’t need Q-Cards to keep a conversation going. Just go with what she says. It’s as easy as that.