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Among the forces of King Menelik of Ethiopia, which repulsed an Italian invasion in the late 19th century. Hopefully, I'd try and assist in Ethiopian modernisation after the conflict, somehow.
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"Look, I'm pretty relaxed for a guy who just lost money on a rave. And who's currently speeding down the highway drunk off my tits. And I'm being chased by someone in a blue Corolla. Woohoo! I just ran a red light!"
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