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She was your first- is she still your only? If that's the case, you're just stuck on her mentally because she means comfort to you, she's familiar (mentally, not as in "a friend") to you. You're also getting grumpy because you're feeling jealousy when you have no right to be jealous- not to say you're not human for feeling that way, but- she's not your girlfriend. What she's done with other guys is not your concern, nor is it any of your business, and you need to be able to face that to get over this.
If you haven't been with any other girls, why not? Go do that. Be her friend, but stay a friend. Or, just fuckin talk to her and see where she stands with you two. She may be employing jealousy tactics to make you want to get back with her. Girls are fuckin CRAZY with that sometimes.
Good luck, let us know.
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