Martha Stewart's Penis Obfuscation Tips:
1. Put your hand in your pocket.
2. Grab the offending appendage with this hand.
3. Pull it to the side so it is parallel to the hips.
4. Rotate it upwards towards your belt buckle or pants button.
This doesn't work with sweatpants. But, hell, sweat pants with a boner is a situation with possibilities too amusing to pass up.
Sometimes the misses catches me pulling off this manuever and subsequentally wears a prideful smile.
|