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As I am sometimes relegated the exciting job of providing live tech support for my mom's powerbook, I have grown to despise and abhor the Mac OS. Seriously, that thing is just so cute and cuddly, but the team responsible for actual functionality for normal people must have all been abducted and replaced by aliens in disguise....
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You do not use a Macintosh, instead you use a Tandy
Kompressor break your glowstick, Kompressor eat your candy
Kompressor open jaws, Kompressor release ants
Kompressor watch you scream, Because Kompressor does not dance
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