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The folded paper-in-rubber band weapon is VERY painful. We used to call them "hornets" (have no idea why), but you could easily leave very large welts, not to mention putting someone's eye out, if you're a good shot.
As for new suggestions:
A billiard ball in a sock (ouch).
A door (ever had a finger slammed in a door? or how about a door slammed in your face?)
Chain-link fence (good for face rubbin')
High-heeled shoe/boot
An Iron
Golf Clubs, etc etc.
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If you're flammable and have legs, you are never blocking a fire exit. - Mitch Hedberg
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