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Question: is he doing this punching/threat of burning as a macho joke thing, or does he have malicious intents (that you detect)?
I know that some of my friends like to beat on each other, and they also do the Zippo thing to me (since I'm the only guy with longhair and a long beard), but they're just being typical 20 something West Virginian males. They're usually either drunk, or just goofing off.
He may expect you to hit back, as a sort of male bonding as strange as that sounds. Nothing malicious, just a redmeat and beer kinda thing.
But knowing those details would help in being able to tell you how to deal with it.
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it's all about self-indulgence
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