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I have always struggled with my weight and my body-image. I was always overweight growing up, and then I lost it all and got in great shape in high school. I was down to a size 9, but more importantly, I was healthy and still had my big hips, which I love. And I also have a great set of hooties, of which I am very proud.
When I had my daughter, I had gotten up to almost 300lbs, and I felt horrible.
Since then I've gone up and down, and have sort of felt good about myself at times, but mostly not. Most of all I just wanted to be active again, because let me be the first to say, diets and starvation are no way to lose weight, eat as well as you can and just be active, and you'll see the results.
Anyway, my husband always made me feel like eating was some horrible thing, and he made me feel guilty anytime I did it. I would eat dinner and he would say " Why are you eating? Didn't you have lunch this afternoon?"
So, now that he is out of my life, I've actually lost weight, without him breathing down my neck, I eat when I'm hungry and I don't worry about what he thinks anymore.
But let me tell you about my lover. I've know him since high school, and I lost touch for about 6 years. When I found him again, all I could think was how he'd see me, since I'm about 50 lbs heavier than I was in high school. Well, he's done nothing but tell me how beautiful and sexy I am, and even his family tell him how they think i'm beautiful.
So the point of my rambling is this, having someone that loves you and wants you regardless of how you look, someone that loves the person you are on the inside, and supports you in everything you do, that really helps you to love yourself and see past the flaws.
Because if you don't love yourself, then how can anyone else?
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If your going to ride my ass, at least pull my hair. Love, Cruisergirl.
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