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raeanna74 · 10-14-2003, 05:08 AM

I would say I've had two important moments in my life.

First was when I'd been with an abusive boyfriend. My parents had packed up my stuff and brought it all home against my protest - Insisted that I come home. After being separated from him for a time thanks to my parent's and family's intervention I wasn't feeling so tied up in him. My Grandmother came and sat to talk with me a long time. He'd had me convinced that he was the only one who could love me. She told me she would always love me because of who I was was, her grandaughter, and not because of anything I did or even what I looked like. I heard the love in her voice then and saw it in her eyes. I broke something inside and I didn't care what my boyfriend thought of me anymore. I took all his gifts and mailed them back to him and I burned all his notes and his picture. Watching his picture melt in the fire was releasing to me. He had no more hold on me. I was free and loved.

Second moment was when my daughter was born. It was actually the second day after the birth because she'd been more in the middle of the night and I was half comatose from drugs the whole next day. It was around 5:00am before any family arrived. She was in my room and woke to nurse and fell back to sleep soon after. I was able to get up by then and got out of bed and held her for a long while just standing there. I could see the Mississippi river out my window to the West and the Sun was behind me. I watched as rays of the sun would shoot across and light up the bluffs as the sun rose. I stood there until everything was shining and the sky was blue. Looking at my daughter and watching her sleep made so many thoughts go through my mind. I know it changed me. It made me more determined, stronger, and gave me such joy.

10-14-2003, 05:08 AM	#10 (permalink)
raeanna74 I'm not a blonde! I'm knot! I'm knot! I'm knot! Location: Upper Michigan	I would say I've had two important moments in my life. First was when I'd been with an abusive boyfriend. My parents had packed up my stuff and brought it all home against my protest - Insisted that I come home. After being separated from him for a time thanks to my parent's and family's intervention I wasn't feeling so tied up in him. My Grandmother came and sat to talk with me a long time. He'd had me convinced that he was the only one who could love me. She told me she would always love me because of who I was was, her grandaughter, and not because of anything I did or even what I looked like. I heard the love in her voice then and saw it in her eyes. I broke something inside and I didn't care what my boyfriend thought of me anymore. I took all his gifts and mailed them back to him and I burned all his notes and his picture. Watching his picture melt in the fire was releasing to me. He had no more hold on me. I was free and loved. Second moment was when my daughter was born. It was actually the second day after the birth because she'd been more in the middle of the night and I was half comatose from drugs the whole next day. It was around 5:00am before any family arrived. She was in my room and woke to nurse and fell back to sleep soon after. I was able to get up by then and got out of bed and held her for a long while just standing there. I could see the Mississippi river out my window to the West and the Sun was behind me. I watched as rays of the sun would shoot across and light up the bluffs as the sun rose. I stood there until everything was shining and the sky was blue. Looking at my daughter and watching her sleep made so many thoughts go through my mind. I know it changed me. It made me more determined, stronger, and gave me such joy. __________________ "Always learn the rules so that you can break them properly." Dalai Lama My Karma just ran over your Dogma.