WhoaitsZ

Life is hard. So hard. Life will drain its very essence from your body and soul if you like it or not.

There were never questions to be asked if you would like to be born, if you’d prefer pale or dark skin. Life never asked you if you wanted a normal or super strong or weak body. Life never asked if you’d prefer brown, red, blonde, gray or what have you hair color.

Life is life and you have it. It isn’t even a ‘take it or leave it’ situation. You have it. Period. Deal with it.

Put down the gun.

In my darkest hours of my darkest days, when the pits of hell have brighter illumination than my soul, I think: suicide.

Guns, knives, poisons, cars. Yes, the tools of destruction may actually out number the tools of creation by a long shot. It’s your choice. You have power to make decisions concerning the fate of your mind, body, and soul.

The problem is we have grown so hard to reach silly goals that we forget that, most likely, we are the ones who put us here to begin with. If we put us here, then it is our fault. And we think, well I fucked up, forgive me or sue me. Well, sir, drop the attitude.

This is not a thought to make you happy about yourself. This thought is not about you owning up to the past to change it. This is about no letting the mistakes become redundant. Mistakes shouldn’t be made two or three times, yet I do them multiple times, myself. I hope you take charge now and do not continue your misjudged ways.

Do not sigh and say ‘I am okay! He survived and so shall I’. No sir. I don’t have the answers and neither do you or a professor or any other being on this planet. Whenever there is a doubt, there will be another path. You can’t ‘doubt’ a perfect road. So since you questioned in the first place there is, somewhere, a little path that may take you elsewhere. It is your sole responsibility in your life to choose the correct ones, unless you wish to lead a pathetic, painful life.

You will fuck up. A lot. You will take the most beautiful path that feels so good to your soul to only trip and crack open your head. You may see a beautiful creature who is such just to lure you to your downfall, your doom, the black beast called depression.

I wish I knew why there are so many things that seem to exist for no other reason than to bring us pain and strife and empty philosophies. I wish I could stretch my hand out to strike it down, but I cannot. But lest I lose my way in the hunt of those who cannot be hunted, I shall first seek that which makes life the positive side of existence. How often do we grow angry and seek to murder our woe before realizing that the demon of misery is also balanced by the wonderful thing we call joy?

I forget daily!

The joy gives us just as much disturbance, or close enough to being equal, than the monsters of sadness. Maybe it isn’t easier for your, but for myself, it’s always been much, much easier focusing on an enemy to strike down with righteous rage than to caress the love.

Many people may think that they certainly do not wish to be so fuzzy and believe love exists. Well, sir, you path is not covered in briars alone; it is one huge nest of poisoness briars and snares and sometime, may it be now or one hundred years in the future, the shepherd and occasional wanderers who do not mind guiding will be gone. When you are a torn open sore from head to toe and you can see your very soul seeping away into oblivion you will wish you had chosen to embrace love instead of acting in the manner of which we fight against; that false mask of power over others and such evil things.

True strength resides in our ability to be truthful and say, yes I am weak, but obviously strong enough to live a good life. Those who turn to hate or being something negative are truly weak for bowing down to evil’s manipulations and choosing easy roads. Funny how actors paint the weak only to one day die and fall. . . to be picked up by the weak ones.

So, you think suicide may work. Possibly a strong drug to change your reality for the time being. It is your body. Do as you wish. There are many kinds of beings in our world and all are strong or weak in their minds and maturity. If you are willing to play the coward, then go. Shepherds have flocks, not solitary lambs who refuse help.

Life didn’t ask you to fit a script. Life is the script that you adjust to and I suggest starting as soon as possible to change and shape it and mold it in your wisdom, and hopefully your love, so you two may come out well in the end. I know I am sick of weakness.