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Thanks for the chuckles.
I'd like to contribute, so I made some up.
1.) Your computer will ride in your lap on an airplane.
2.) Your computer is always ready to play a new game.
3.) If you watch tv while you play with your computer, it won't complain that you're "distracted".
4.) You should be proud of upgrading to a newer one every year.
5.) A hot computer is always ready to show off for your friends.
6.) You can yell at your computer and get sympathy from other people.
7.) Your computer can blow itself - all day long.
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