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On my birthday, my wife took me to the strip club with a few friends of mine. She threw dollars across the runway to me for put in other women's underwear. I was wearing a marching band hat purchased as a birthday present. The strippers, while sticking their boobs in my face, asked me why I was wearing that hat. I would look them in the eye with a huge grin and tell them "I'm the Captain!".
I married a queen.
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