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Geez...
This is a big huge pile of shit melodrama.
Who gives a shit who slept with who?
Do you want to be with her? Then do it.
It's not about sex.
It's about trust.
Start from stratch, both of you forget the past.
Define your relationship.
Is it open or closed?
If it open then you damn well better understand the consequences.
BTW, considering your emotional state now, I would suggest closed.
It doesn't sound like either one of you can handle an open one.
Since this is true, agree to this, and don't betray each other.
Simple
Control your damn hormones, use them on each other.
If neither of you can't, then separate...because this roller-coaster is silly.
Please for your own sanity, forget the past.
Focus on each other.
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