This is going to get me in a hot pan o' flames...
The band Mudvayne once sang/bellowed, "Let me help you tie the rope around your neck. Let me help to talk you the wrong way off the ledge. Let me help you hold the glock against your head. Let me help you chain the weights onto your legs - get on the plank, fuck."
And that's how I feel about this shit. You want to die? Then die. Stop wasting my oxygen. You want to cry for help? Then cry for help verbally, and not in such an incredibly selfish way. It sickens me, these people who decide they're going to risk their own life for attention - and then they carry it on their sleeve like it's some sort of badge of honor. There's nothing honorable or cool or positive in anyway shape or form of having attempted suicide, or cut yourself, or thrown up every time you eat. It's not good, it's not healthy, and it is among the most selfish things a human being can do. There is no thought to others, only about how miserable one's own self is. As Dennis Leary once said, "'I'm just not happy. My life didn't turn out the way I wanted it to.' Yeah, join the fucking club, okay pal?" 90% of the people I've met that have been "diagnosed" (and I use that term looser than a 2 dollar whore) with bipolar or unipolar disease are schmucks who are looking for something other than themselves to blame for the utter uselessness, worthlessness and failure that is their life. And I've met a lot of these people. How did I meet all of them, you ask? Because I used to be that way. I used to pretend myself day in and day out that nobody loved me and nobody cared about me and it was just so goddamned amazing that my life was even as good as it was (and it wasn't) because it was all because of me. I used to be like that. I used to cut myself. I used to entertain what I thought were "serious" thoughts of suicide, thinking "no one will miss me, it won't matter." I've been to psychiatric wards on three separate occassions. I've met the people with real problems (the 14 year old who shot his own uncle in the head) and the people who don't (the guy who used a paper clip to etch an anarchy symbol on his arm because he thought it looked cool). Let me tell you, there are so many people out there whose only problem is themself. My message to them: get the fuck over it, get a job, go to school, find someone to love, and LIVE.
I congratulate succesful suicides on making this world a little better with their absence.
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Doing my best not to end up like Kathleen Chang.
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