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i have had only one woman try the "you're not getting sex unless" thing with me. I wasn't married to her, we were just sexual partners at the time. As it turned out she wanted something more from our relationship even though we had agreed on the front end it was just great sex for both of us. Instead of coming out and saying it, she chose to try to force me into it. I was very angry with all this and told her it was over. I then started dating someone else and then she had the nerve to say i was cheating on her.....A real whack job!
From that point on I made sure whomever I was with, we were on the same page emotionally and sexually.
angela146 has the right idea, but this comes with honesty and trust.
my 2 cents
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I never said you had to.
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