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If it's only been a year since you started masturbating - how old are you - like, 12 or 13?
Show me someone who says he never masturbated before the age of 17, and I'll show you a liar.
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If you want to avoid 95% of internet spelling errors:
"If your ridiculous pants are too loose, you're definitely going to lose them. Tell your two loser friends over there that they're going to lose theirs, too."
It won't hurt your fashion sense, either.
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