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At one place, everyone went on vacation the same week except me - and I didn't have much of a workload that week, so I spent most of the days surfing porn sites (this was the mid-90s and I didn't have internet service at home yet). I locked the office doors and pulled all the shades, so privacy wasn't an issue.
Actually, it was a very memorable wanking - I took all day, never felt hurried, and by the time I finally got real serious about it, it was a very satisfying orgasm.
You know . . . back when I used to do that sort of thing . . .
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If you want to avoid 95% of internet spelling errors:
"If your ridiculous pants are too loose, you're definitely going to lose them. Tell your two loser friends over there that they're going to lose theirs, too."
It won't hurt your fashion sense, either.
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