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Old 08-01-2003, 06:29 AM   #42 (permalink)
jbrooks544
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Hey, I'm just giving you my take. I expected and understand your response - no biggie. You can treat what I say as being the "devil's advocate". I understand the other advise and I'm sure it is all fine.

I think your list of priorities are very good and that you should probably do all of those things.

My basic points are:

!. Anyone that sounds as depressed as you might be and who cries for help by mentioning suicide, might need help. Any other problems pale in comparison to any mention or consideration of suicide. Finding friends (or not) probably won't help whatever the problem is (medical maybe) that causes you to mention suicide, and could make it worse if you are only dissapointed in the short term.
2. I was trying to show some life perspective by saying that whether you find friends in the next year or two should not be viewed as the most important thing in your life. It won't matter much 10 or 20 years from now that you didn't have many or any friends this year. By realizing this, then perhaps you won't be so obsessed about it and you will be able to say "fark it, I'll just live my life and friends will find me". If you try to hard and think about it too much it will hurt your efforts to make friends. You'll find meaningful friends if you devote yourself to your education and your true fun interests. That way you will be sucessful and meet people with similar interests. If you put too much emphasis on finding friends then what will you do if it doesn't happen right away? I would be great if it does, but I'm just worried that you could be setting yourself up for big hurt, and then what do you do? In order to make friends you have to be ok with yourself first - not depressed - not hating yourself - not very low self esteem. This is why you need to work on yourself first and be good with yourself. Because after this happens then you will be the kind of fun, happy person that people end up liking. You need to like yourself before others can like you. You need to love yourself before others can love you. To get there you might need anti-depressant (50% chance?) and you need to do things to feel better about yourself, like be independant, do well at school and do things you like.

Good luck, don't give up, and remember that what happens to you in the next year or two won't matter 2 rat shiats 12 years from now, but being happy and successful and not killing yourself sure will matter 12 years from now.
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