Quote:
Originally posted by jbrooks544
It might not help to leap right into being a random roommate at this late stage. By Junior/senior year most groups of friends are well established and you might not have much luck. If you set yourself up for another dissapointment then that wouldn't help you. What about your highschool friends? I had some friends in college but I don't keep in touch with ANY of them now and I don't see it as any huge life lost. I still have 4 or 5 very close friends from High school. I have a few other newer friends that are awesome. You need to see a doctor about your depression if you think of suicide. Doctors are good and they will help you erase those unhealthy feelings. If you had life-threatening cancer would you go to the doctor? sure you would! Depression and suicide are no different. You need to be sure that you salvage your education first. Finish school and get a good job and find some new friends out in the world doing things that you enjoy.
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Well, the problem is that my education and social life go hand in hand. It's taken me awhile to realize this but it's true. One would think I would be doing well academically with all the spare time of having no social life but that is not the case. There's just not the motivation to do well. When I had friends a long time ago there was always kind of a sense of competition. I'm not doing too badly as grades go, but I should definitely be doing better. About groups of friends being established by Junior/Senior year; that is exactly what I think is reality and why I feel like such an alien on campus now more than ever. Deep down I hope this isn't entirely the situation though. I know I can't just keep waiting for the next stage in life to become social. And as for highschool, I had a group of friends/acquaintances that I hung out with but I never did anything outside of school with them. I see them occasionaly in college but it's just an awkward "Hi".
So with all things considered, you may be right about going to the doctor and/or getting therapy. I don't know how I would get around it without my parents finding out. They would flip (not in a bad way), especially my mom, wondering what's wrong. It's pretty personal and I don't think my family should be involved or know about it. That would be another good reason to get out of the house soon if I need that kind of help.
Anyway... I sincerely appreciate the advice from everyone even if I'm still confused.