It's really a combination of everything in your lifestyle. It's not any ONE thing.
Exercise is probably the most important of all.
Secondly, "grazing" really does work.
Think of it this way: If your meals are a long time apart you're sending your body a message that it needs to store more fat because it doesn't know when that next meal will be. Its an evolutionary mechanism for people who live(d) in areas where food was scarce.
On the other hand, if you eat alot of small meals a day you're telling your body that food is plentiful so it doesn't need to store as much fat.
Combine excerise with eating properly: never skip a meal and instead of gorging yourself at a main meal, eat less and have a couple snacks in the daytime instead.
That should do the trick.
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