SPLEEN'S VENGENCE PREDICTIONS
Lesnar vs Angle vs BigShmo
Lesnar will RETAIN the championship with BigShmo F-ing the entire match up, making it entirely unwatchable. See my previous statements about Big Show for reasons why.
Benoit vs Guerrero
Duh, Benoit wins the US title. Obviously.
VinnieMac vs Gowan
Gowan by disqualification. There is no way that VinnieMac is going to job to Gowan.
Taker vs Cena
Cena. Taker is getting old and needs to pass the torch on to someone else. Why Cena? He's done more cheesy promos than any other wrestler in recent memory.
McMaHHHon vs Sable
Uhh... Double Count Out. I don't know. Don't really care either. But, McMaHHHon will probaly win if a DoubleCountOut doesn't occur.
Gunn vs Noble
Noble will win, and get to sleep with Tori. Nidia is probably going to chair Noble so he is unconcious, and probably slam Tori as well. They will both be "sleeping" together in the middle of the ring because of this. Mr.Ass will realize that nobody likes him and will retire.
The Worlds Greatest Benjamin vs Mysterio/Kidman
Benjamin will RETAIN the championship, as Mysterio is impaled on a ringpost. Kidman will find out that he needs some character development and give Mysterio a shooting star press from the buildings rafters down to the ring.
The APA Barroom Brawl
Umm... yeah. Have you seen the list of competitors?
Bradshaw, Faarooq, OHaire, Kanyon, Rhyno, ATrain, Brooklyn Brawler, Doink, and Spanky.
Kanyon will be the first one eliminated, by Spanky (penis). Doink will realize that he used to have a career and eliminate ATrain. Rhyno will Gore Faarooq, but will be eliminated by Bradshaw. At this point, everyone realizes that OHaire hasn't done anything, and Doink, Bradshaw, Faarooq, Penis and Brooklyn Brawler will all eliminate OHaire. Bradshaw and Faarooq team up and take out Doink while Spanky is elminated by Brawler.
Bradshaw, Faarooq and the Brawler will all look at each other, laugh, drink a beer and all pass out at the same time.