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-- You start eating more fruit, and can discuss the pros and cons of different varieties of apples ("Royal Galas kick ass over Braeburns")
- You live on your own in a big city and you're thinking of moving to the 'burbs because you'd kill for a private parking place and to never have to do your clothes at the laundromat again.
- You pass on a piece of hard-won wisdom to some young fart, and he/she rolls his eyes at you. The first eye-roll from a teenager is a true sign of approaching middle age.
- You fall asleep in front of the TV. At 10 pm.
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