ok, good news. i FINALLY got around to double checking the ram by swapping the two 64mb sticks and making sure they were seated ALL the way. one quick reboot later and I do indeed have 256mb of ram. I guess the last time the one stick wasnt seated all the way.
wow, 256mb of ram, Im finally in the big time
note: I'm not above charity. if any of you have any old sticks of 128 or > ram you'd like to donate to a worthy cause, i have my PM's set to popup automatically.