I think the things or attributes that turn someone on or off are partly decided by genes and partly by life experiences, like the relationship with the parents and of the parents, and experiences with partners and friends.
If something that attracted me to my girlfriend turns out to be a major source of frustration in the long run, good chance I'd be less likely to be attracted to this feature again.
On the other hand I could think about it and deal with it and start to like it -and her- alot more. In that sense I think I have some control over what I move towards, or away from.
Over the past couple of years I've been having more and more...kinky..fantasies, mainly because they're such a major turnon, but if I were more conventional I might be motivated to pursue more vanilla fantasies. But I wouldn't be sure how succesful I'd be though.
It seems that a fair percentage of pedophiles seriously try their hardest to overcome their attraction to children, even to the extent of forcing themselves into a conventional marriage and spend their lives longing for that wich they KNOW they can't have.
Is there anyone here tried to stop themselves from liking somebody, or tried to make himself fall in love with someone?
I've managed to keep myself from falling in love, but it would always linger in the background.
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In ancient Greece it appears that the norm was to be attracted to attractive people, regardless of gender. There were very few long term homosexual relationships, but it was not considered unusual for a teacher to be attracted to his (male) students, and have a sexual relationship with them.
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Also it was quite stylish for a man of position to ehm, have a young boy (around 12 years old) as a compagnion. Something about the young beauty that would reflect on them. They'd hang around, naked and perform sexual services on them.
For the boy and his family this was considered an honour and it added to their status.