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-Anders, don't worry about your english--it's better than my local news can boast. you speak/write beautifully.
i've been in situations similar to this...i guess lots of people have. they're really hard to deal with, and i think you're quite strong to get through this far. don't forget how strong you are--no matter what she does, she can't take yourself away from you, you know? (that might sound cheesy, but it's true.) i've really hurt a person in a situation like this...i was the bad guy. but the person i hurt didn't deserve it at all, nomatter the circumstances, and he knows that. you should know it too. i hope things work out for the best for you, with or without sandie.
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