Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community - View Single Post

TIO · 06-27-2003, 12:22 PM

Be careful of reputations. DO NOT come on to ANYONE in your first 2 weeks unless they make the first move, or you'll find that you're the college sleaze. DO buy the upper year students in your dorms a few beers the first time you see them at the tav. They'll buy you a few later on, so your money isn't gone, and they'll like you a hell of a lot more than the other freshers. This is very useful, not just because you have mates in the high years, but also because you just might score their notes and assignment solutions

Now that you have an upper-year friend, use the bastard. Ask about all of your lecturers, ask for help in your units, ask for text books they might be able to lend you. And don't forget to keep the beer flowing, so they know that helping you out pays. I'm not really talking about bribes or being a whiney little fresher who does nothing but ask for stuff and buy beer...make friends, but remember that they can be useful for uni stuff, and are usually more than happy to help, because first year wasn't that long ago for them.

There is only one way to study for exams: PAST PAPERS. They are a gift from above. If they're in the library, great. If they're not, it's probably because the examiner doesn't change the paper each year, so ask someone who has done the unit before if they can remember any of the exam questions

A minor one: if you know you're going to have a particular lecturer for many units, get to know them. Try and join their sporting team, or go to the same pub if they're young, or even just talk for 5 minutes after a couple of lectures. Knowing your lecturers, and more importantly having them know you, is invaluable.

Never, ever, EVER tell racist or sexist jokes. Even if you're just joking, and they're your friends, you never know when a self-righteous arts student is going to attack you, and believe me, there's no pretty way out of getting attacked by a self-righteous arts student. Besides, you can generally find a clean (or at least not racist/sexist) joke that's just as funny.

OWN ALL THE FOLLOWING THINGS:
(None of these are optional)
-At least one literary novel, and one book on philosophy. Read and understand both of them. Chicks love to see them on your shelves, but you need to be able to back it up.
-A kettle, at least 4 mugs, and a good supply of tea bags and instant coffee. UHT milk, sugar and teaspoons are also good. If nothing else, it means that you can at least pretend you really wanted her to come up for coffee.
-A swiss army knife. Until you move out of home, and no longer have the kitchen drawers to turn to, you'll never realisehow useful a swiss army knife is. Make sure it has a phillips-head screwdriver.
-A good dictionary and a good thesaurus. They'll help your essays to no end.
-A spare can of deodourant, toothbrush and small tube of toothpaste in your backpack, at all times, for those occasions when you thought you were going out for 10 minutes and didn't get back 'till Thursday
-At least one bottle of really good alcohol, for special occasions.
-A 6-pack cooler, for bring-your-own parties
-How to be a Man by John Birmingham and Dirk Flinthart

DO NOT OWN ANY OF THE FOLLOWING THINGS:
-A TV. Sounds like a good idea, but you'll waste way too much time. If there's something you really wanna watch, find a communal TV (common rooms for 24, a pub for sports). It's more fun that way anyway. There is one exception to this rule: if you have an old (and I mean Atari 2600 old) game console, bring that up. It's great fun for getting pissed and having a few games of space inavders or Pong. But for god's sake, don't bring your X-Box. Not only will it eat your whole first year, you'll also never chase the crowd out of your room.
-A single condom within easy reach of your bed. Many a man has been spared from a very big mistake in the time it takes to walk across the room and back.
-Any porn mags. Ralph & FHM are cool as long as you don't try to hide them (if you leave them lieing around, people will believe that you read them for the articles), but you'll get a real bad rep with chicks if someone finds a copy of "XXX Shaved Shags" under your bed. Get your porn online.

06-27-2003, 12:22 PM	#54 (permalink)
TIO Addict Location: The Land Down Under	Be careful of reputations. DO NOT come on to ANYONE in your first 2 weeks unless they make the first move, or you'll find that you're the college sleaze. DO buy the upper year students in your dorms a few beers the first time you see them at the tav. They'll buy you a few later on, so your money isn't gone, and they'll like you a hell of a lot more than the other freshers. This is very useful, not just because you have mates in the high years, but also because you just might score their notes and assignment solutions Now that you have an upper-year friend, use the bastard. Ask about all of your lecturers, ask for help in your units, ask for text books they might be able to lend you. And don't forget to keep the beer flowing, so they know that helping you out pays. I'm not really talking about bribes or being a whiney little fresher who does nothing but ask for stuff and buy beer...make friends, but remember that they can be useful for uni stuff, and are usually more than happy to help, because first year wasn't that long ago for them. There is only one way to study for exams: PAST PAPERS. They are a gift from above. If they're in the library, great. If they're not, it's probably because the examiner doesn't change the paper each year, so ask someone who has done the unit before if they can remember any of the exam questions A minor one: if you know you're going to have a particular lecturer for many units, get to know them. Try and join their sporting team, or go to the same pub if they're young, or even just talk for 5 minutes after a couple of lectures. Knowing your lecturers, and more importantly having them know you, is invaluable. Never, ever, EVER tell racist or sexist jokes. Even if you're just joking, and they're your friends, you never know when a self-righteous arts student is going to attack you, and believe me, there's no pretty way out of getting attacked by a self-righteous arts student. Besides, you can generally find a clean (or at least not racist/sexist) joke that's just as funny. OWN ALL THE FOLLOWING THINGS: (None of these are optional) -At least one literary novel, and one book on philosophy. Read and understand both of them. Chicks love to see them on your shelves, but you need to be able to back it up. -A kettle, at least 4 mugs, and a good supply of tea bags and instant coffee. UHT milk, sugar and teaspoons are also good. If nothing else, it means that you can at least pretend you really wanted her to come up for coffee. -A swiss army knife. Until you move out of home, and no longer have the kitchen drawers to turn to, you'll never realisehow useful a swiss army knife is. Make sure it has a phillips-head screwdriver. -A good dictionary and a good thesaurus. They'll help your essays to no end. -A spare can of deodourant, toothbrush and small tube of toothpaste in your backpack, at all times, for those occasions when you thought you were going out for 10 minutes and didn't get back 'till Thursday -At least one bottle of really good alcohol, for special occasions. -A 6-pack cooler, for bring-your-own parties -How to be a Man by John Birmingham and Dirk Flinthart DO NOT OWN ANY OF THE FOLLOWING THINGS: -A TV. Sounds like a good idea, but you'll waste way too much time. If there's something you really wanna watch, find a communal TV (common rooms for 24, a pub for sports). It's more fun that way anyway. There is one exception to this rule: if you have an old (and I mean Atari 2600 old) game console, bring that up. It's great fun for getting pissed and having a few games of space inavders or Pong. But for god's sake, don't bring your X-Box. Not only will it eat your whole first year, you'll also never chase the crowd out of your room. -A single condom within easy reach of your bed. Many a man has been spared from a very big mistake in the time it takes to walk across the room and back. -Any porn mags. Ralph & FHM are cool as long as you don't try to hide them (if you leave them lieing around, people will believe that you read them for the articles), but you'll get a real bad rep with chicks if someone finds a copy of "XXX Shaved Shags" under your bed. Get your porn online. __________________ Strewth Last edited by TIO; 08-08-2003 at 12:01 AM..