KirStang

My impression of Marriage:

In 1960, the amount of couples who cohabitated numbered around 500,000. In 2000, that number jumped 1000% (or 10 times) to about 5 million cohabitating couples. The number is even higher now in 2010.

These days, marriage is seen more as a province for the elite--the majority of those married are college educated couples who earn a solid middle class income (I don't have the figures offhand. I just remember reading a reputable article about this.) However, marriages by college educated couples report drastically lower rates of divorce, and seem to be the 'happier' type of marriages we envision. IIRC, divorce between college aged couples is around 21%, but closer to 50% for high school educated couples.

OTOH: Marriage is seen as a big step, hence the big jump in cohabitation by younger couples. Whereas in the past, cohabitation without marriage may have carried stigma, these days, cohabitation is more of the norm as couples wait before getting married.
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I don't think marriage is necessary to obtain the benefits of a long-term monogamous relationship. However, many, many legal benefits are tied to marriage, including rights of survivorship at death, election in to the estate at death, military housing, joint income tax returns, tenancy by the entireties (protects the home against creditors) etc.

The relationship itself is what generates the 'good vibes' I think. However, the law still draws a formalistic distinction between unmarried and married couples. IIRC, states have steadfastly refused to recognize marital benefits (i.e. division of property at separation) between couples who have not formalized their relationship.

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Do people view you differently?

Yes. My parents friends always ask me if I have a girlfriend. I know my friends' parents worry about my friends' getting married. As one magazine succintly put it, marriage is like a merit badge. It shows you're not a super rapist weirdo.

JM2CW.

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