Originally Posted by thirtiesgirl

Despite your protests to the contrary, Baraka, I do get it. You're one among several who has missed my point, by choice or because you really don't get it. I don't know. My point (which I believe I've stated several times quite clearly is this thread) is that when you approach a woman who doesn't know you, she has no way of knowing what your intentions are. Do you get that?? You may know that your intentions are nothing more than to say hi, to ask her the time, or to flirt with her in what you assume is a "harmless" manner. But she does not know that, especially if she doesn't know you. Again, she cannot see inside your mind. She may also have other things on her mind (as I've mentioned several times already in this thread). Perhaps she was the victim of a sexual assault. Perhaps she's too busy to talk or waste time flirting with you. So if her reaction is to tell you to step off, go away, leave her alone, or to ignore you completely, don't get pissy about it, don't assume that she's a cold hearted, man hating bitch, don't assume she doesn't "get you," and all the various misconceptions that several guys here have been making on a regular basis. Be respectful and leave her alone.

When you continue to insist, as you and other guys here have done, that "I don't have any idea what I'm talking about," that women who behave this way are engaging in "misandry," that we "assume all men are rapists," you're engaging in problematic behavior. It marginalizes womens' right to be left alone, to simply be female in public without receiving constant attention from men. I'm calling you out on that problematic behavior. Not because I think you and other guys here are bad people, or because I think you engage in that behavior, but because you and other guys' words in this thread have shown that you still think it's within your rights to insist that women respond to you in a certain way, that women have to see you as a "good guy" who has no harmful intentions towards them, simply because you insist it's so. Do you see how that's problematic behavior? I really don't think it's so hard to understand.

I understand that it's no fun to be called out on your problematic behavior. It's no fun to be told you're behaving in ways, or making assumptions, that are harmful to a marginalized portion of the population. But I hope it might make you think twice in the future.


Considering the way some of the guys in this thread have been acting, I'm sure you can understand why I might not think chinese_crested made an honest mistake. And what, exactly, was not "nice" about my response? Does this "uppity misandrist female" need to be schooled in how to be a "nice lady"? *eyeroll*


Thanks for the apology and explanation. Understood.