Quote:
Originally Posted by chinese crested
You have the chance for a sneak attack - show how indespensible you are. ... If a man reduces her to tears, be her friend, get her to slip into her equivalent of a little black frock - and tell her nearly all men are bastards - and you should know because you are one - and he doesnt deserve her - take her out looking good - the things a mate would do....
When she tries a new look, notice it and say something positive, give her a warm smile to carry through the day.
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The rest of the advice was okay from this, but what I snagged above... don't do that. That's classic Nice Guy Syndrome and it's creepy as hell.
If she's complaining to you about her guy friends confessing their feelings to her, then she's warding you off. I do it all the time. Sometimes, when I have lunch with one male friend and dinner with another (that are knowingly in the friend category), I'll bounce them off each other in conversation, just to enforce how little I enjoy my guy friends disclosing romantic interest towards me. It's the equivalent of the "I have a boyfriend" line for guys that know you're single.
If you move in with her, do so under total (and I really mean total) acceptance of maintaining a platonic relationship. If you don't, she'll know it. It might be subconscious, but she'll pick up on it and things will get awkward really fast.
HOWEVER...
Spending time together breeds familiarity, sometimes breeds sexual interest and/or love. If it happens, it happens. Don't force it. Don't hope for it. Just live your life, date, screw, work, and if it comes up, it comes up.
Also, you could move in temporarily, just as a way to find your bearings, find out what area/street/whatever you want to be in, having less of a commute in the meantime while she looks for a more permanent roommate and has the time to find one that would actually work out for her.
Which could be nice.