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Your insistence that the quality of your thoughts are not really your own but are caused by the actions of another are not rational. Shit happens. People aren't always great to each other. That's not a free pass to uninhibited hatred. You will not be free of this until you realize *you* are the one betraying yourself. I've no interest in how nice you think you are. What you are showing to us here is unabashed self-indulgence making whatever you claim this woman did to you seem suspect. Your imagination has already proved to be very flowery.
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Most people go through life dreading they'll have a traumatic experience. Freaks were born with their trauma. They've already passed their test in life. They're aristocrats. - Diane Arbus
PESSIMISM, n. A philosophy forced upon the convictions of the observer by the disheartening prevalence of the optimist with his scarecrow hope and his unsightly smile. - Ambrose Bierce
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