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Masterchef has a different and particular meaning to anyone from the UK. Its the name of a popular cookery show. The general point is the same though, it refers to an excellent cook. Which I am.
I am very happy to take on all of these people who "live food" who call themselves "chef" when they are just a cook, who consider chopping and exposing to heat foodstuffs some kind of art.
Let me first of all inform you that:
1 - fine dining is a joke that clever marketeers play on people with more money than brains... middle class poseurs who pay through the nose to eat over priced, over complicated, unfulfilling meals.
A REAL Masterchef can tell you that honest, simple, fresh, lovingly prepared food is more enjoyable to someone with a real pallete than a plate with three microchips and half a tuna steak and a fennel "foam" that you pay some maniac who shouts at people to pretend he is Gordon Ramsey $50 to make you.
Food is about three things, delivered in three ways
1 - Comfort
2 - Nourishment
3 - Pleasure/Taste
The goal of a REAL masterchef is to prepare this in a way that is
1 - Cheap
2 - Quick
3 - Simple
This pizza I have designed is delicious. I have eaten it myself, maybe 5 times this year. Everytime, really really good. Why would I want to hand toss pizza dough for myself? I wore a jumper to work today, I didnt go out and sheer the sheep myself. What I am presenting is real food for real people thats really good. I can put up 20 recipes that are all top quality, just like that. I could do it tomorrow if I felt like it.
And you know what?
Everyone could be made by a normal person with no cooking experience.
Everyone would taste good.
Everyone would be better than some Michelin restaurant where they dont give you youre dinner, they give you a "dining experience"
I dont speak for or represent those who eat at Michelin restaurants and treat good honest food as contemptable.
I dont speak for those who look down and sneer at ordinary working class men and women that go out and do a day's work and then just want to have a simple filling meal when they get home.
I dont speak for those who treat call a man who pays over his hard earned cash for a burger at a restaurant and then DARES to ask for some tomato sauce as if he is some kind of revolting philistine.
Lord Eden, if this is the constituancy you wish to represent, you are welcome to each other.
I represent the working mum who gets home at six and wants to give her kids a decent meal, even if she doesnt own 7 types of vinegar and bake her own bread in a tin kettle.
I represent the man who expects to be given some tomato sauce with his meal if he asks.
I masterchef the meals that these people want.
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Anyone who thinks that my arguments have been knocked down in the weapons thread must have a warped view of life. I dont choose to engage in personal battles, I simply make statements of fact and common sense. Almost every one of these long drawn out arguments just showed me again and again proving my view as correct and common sense.
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"Do not tell lies, and do not do what you hate,
for all things are plain in the sight of Heaven. For nothing
hidden will not become manifest, and nothing covered will remain
without being uncovered."
The Gospel of Thomas
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