This is the one area of my life that has been a major disappointment. I've managed to graduate from college, get a high paying-job, and career wise things are going great. But I haven't done anything sexual with a woman. EVER.
There are many reasons for this. I've always been an introverted type, really hated the bar/club scene. Got picked on a lot during high school and just kept to myself out of habit I guess and became a loner. I focused on my education and said to myself all I needed to do was get a good career going and the rest would fall into place. I had left high school with big plans to get laid in college but life has a funny way of changing your plans. I dealt with years of family garbage in college that really fucked me up. I was lucky I even graduated.
I've gone back and forth on going to Reno or Vegas or Amsterdamn and just going to a legal brothel and getting my problem taken "care of." If it wasn't for the risks of STD, I would have done it years ago.
The thing I'm concerned about is if I meet a woman I like I won't know what to do on dates and make a fool of myself, from simple stuff like kissing her to fucking her. It's all outside of my expeience.
Do I tell her? I figure lots of young guys don't know what the hell is going on and make fools of themselves in bed all the time so maybe I won't stand out too much. It's not rocket science. I've seen it all in porn. I'd probably last a hell of a long time in bed too given that I've been jerking off for the last 13 years and my penis is used to the sensation of my hand to get off not a pussy.
If the subject of past relationships comes up, do I tell her and risk looking like a loser or do I lie and make up a backstory to try and appear more normal?
But before any of this comes up, I got to get out there and meet women. Work isn't really an option to meet women and that's my main social outlet and where I spend most of my day. I wake up. Go to work. Go Home. Jerk Off. And the cylce repeats sometimes with the variety of a jerk off after I wake up and sometimes not.
