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I'm proudly intolerant of religious ideas, but not religious people. I think this is a stupid idea, made particularly so by the religion that advances it.
On the issue at hand, I think that the host has a particular honor in all situations, and you really should not come into someone's house and then request the host or homeowner meet your demands, as it were. "House rules" mean exactly that, and if someone is uncomfortable with what someone has decided then they ought not visit at all.
So my advice to this person would be to take her brother aside and tell him that the wine is very important to her and that she will be drinking it at the house, even when he and his children are present. If he does not wish to be around it, then he is free to leave. This is, presuming of course, that drinking the wine when he is there is more important to her than the potential loss of a relationship with her brother and his kids.
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"I'm typing on a computer of science, which is being sent by science wires to a little science server where you can access it. I'm not typing on a computer of philosophy or religion or whatever other thing you think can be used to understand the universe because they're a poor substitute in the role of understanding the universe which exists independent from ourselves." - Willravel
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