I'm not pissing. I just totally disagree its dorky. It has none of the qualifications of being dorky.
Anyway, I don't understand what you want out of your armor. First you say you care less about historically accurate. Then you say you want to test it vs historical weapons?
And repairs are costly and time consuming.
edit check out this site for a ton of accurate info on japanese armor.
http://www.sengokudaimyo.com/
edit: Or are you simply looking for armor that works well? If that's the case then layers. Outside make it aluminum. Next layer, leather. Then foam. You won't feel a thing when you get hit. You
could replace the aluminum with steel but it will weigh like twice as much and not offer much more protection (the best thing about steel is that you don't need to fix it as much as aluminum.)
edit: altho you really only need two layers. The most common are aluminum and foam on the inside. Plastic (looks the most realistic believe it or not for japanese armor) with foam padding. Or leather with foam padding. I've only known one dude in the entire SCA to fight with steel armor. Personally I'm not a pain wuss so I just use one layer so its lighter and breathes better.
edit2: now if you simply mean you want modern armor for today's world then just go buy kevlar and a helmet made for it, like SWAT wears with possibly some ceramic inserts. Even though kevlar is weak toward slashing...no one is likely to attack you with a sword.