Quote:
Originally Posted by Anonymous Member
So Im in a relationship with someone who isn't as sexually, ah, interested as I am. Great lady, beautiful, killer body, very giving, generous and thoughtful. I get extremely aroused anytime Im within 50 yards of her. She doesn't run as hot...bad relationships, personality, upbringing whatever. I could go once every few days, she's fine with once every month it seems.
Im starting to look at other woman in public and porn in private. Is this relationship doomed? The pull is getting stronger the more she holds out on me. I think she enjoys the control. How do you monogamous people Avoid Temptation while in a relationship?
|
On the one hand, there's nothing wrong with one partner having a slightly different sex drive than the other; and if that means you scope some hotness in public, and enrich your collection of downloaded spankables to compensate, so be it-- that's just how some relationships roll. Just be sure to have a look but don't touch rule for any other woman but her.
On the other hand, you need to be discussing this with her: because if your sex drive is a few times a week, and hers is once a month, in the long run, that is going to be a hell of a challenge. I know I personally could not make that work. And especially if she is one of those people who has extremely uncompromising views about porn, and/or is going to have insecurity issues if she knows you're doing some T&A sightseeing when you're out and about, then you've got a problem.
This doesn't at all have to be irresolvable, or chock full of dealbreakers, or anything but a set of compromises you both can live with. But talk about it sooner rather than later, because I promise you, one way or the other, better it gets dealt with before it becomes a problem.
Edit: Just went back and read some of the rest of the thread that I'd skimmed over earlier. I have to stop doing that. It sounds like this chick is dealing with serious issues, and those are not about to resolve overnight. And it also sounds like your primary reason for being with her is that she's got a bangin' bod. Which I get. But if you ask me, that is not at all enough for a relationship. A fuck, sure. But not a relationship. And while I totally understand the desire to get with someone who's got junk that goes to 11, and the curves to match, can I just say from experience-- it's better to be with a 7 or and 8 who wants to go all night every which way than a 9 or 10 who either thinks a bed's just something for sleeping in, or who's harder to cold-start than '66 Dodge Dart. And that's not even getting into the whole area of: it's better to be with someone who's fun to be with and reasonably together than someone who's life is essentially a canvas for the Jackson Pollock-esque sprays of her colorful neuroses and psychological traumas. I'm just sayin'.