I've been with my bf for 5.5 years but 2.5 years long distance. I've supported him in the Army for 2 years now. We've also been good friends 2 years prior to dating.
I know I had a history on here about writing about my jealousy issues but surprisingly we've gotten through all of that. So please don't judge this break up on the past things I wrote.
Well, anyways...3 days ago my ex begs me to get on Skype. He was crying really hard like I've never seen so I knew something bad was going to happen to us. He told me that lately his feelings changed in the past month and that he tried so hard for it to come back. When I visited him, the feelings didn't come back...and he said it wasn't fair to drag me along when he felt this way.
I asked if there was someone else or if he cheated and he said "no" and that he has no idea why this happened. He thinks maybe the Army and long distance caught up to him...
But since we've known eachother for soooo many years, he does not want me to disappear from his life and would like to be friends. We've always been open and honest with eachother no matter how difficult.
So, lately he's been keeping in contact with me through text. I can tell we're still sad about the relationship ending...I don't know why he's sad when he broke up with me. Today, I was the one that contacted him..he seems to be keeping friends around to distract him. He seems happy on Facebook but when I talk to him he sounds stressed. Looking at his Facebook makes me so sad and feel like he's happy with all his silly statuses...but he told me that he'll monitor his Facebook of girl's writing hurtful things or tagged pics. Then he asked if I could do the same...I said okay. So that no one feels jealous...
I don't want to do "no contact", but I feel like it's necessary to stop the habit of us talking every day from the past 5.5 years. I am scared to death of losing him for good as a friend or anything. We've been eachother's confidant. He begged me not to do this but then later said if I had to do this go ahead but if he needed to talk to me any that I should call no matter what.
I talked to him tonight, and I still feel like we're on good terms and the communication is widely open but we're still hurting. I feel happy talking to him but then I don't know if this is best idea and I'm not sure if this makes it harder to move on???
I'm so confused. I like being able to talk to him about everything and anything...I'm scared doing "no contact" will cause us to lose what we had at the beginning of our friendship (before dating) when we could talk about anything and everything.
So frustrating! What should I do??? We can't monitor our Facebook pages forever just to keep the other from feeling jealous! I keep looking at his wall too...
Why the hell does he seem to be so sad and stressed out when HE BROKE up with me? He compared himself (during this break up) to a bike with a pedal missing to keep him going and that he felt that his change of feelings weren't meant to be but happened. That this wasn't suppose to happen. But like he said, he felt guilty about kissing and hugging me as if he was lying to me when he wasn't in love.
Also when he leaves for training for his deployment in June, I agreed that if by then we're "okay" and not seeing anyone that I will visit him before he deploys to Afghanistan. I can't bare the thought of not seeing him one last time if he were to die or be seriously injured..... Ugh, visiting? We've always had a big sexual attraction so I think I'll wear a chastity belt when I visit haha..
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http://www.tfproject.org/tfp/tilted-...#ixzz1CDIH5C00