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The author of the quoted article is fooling herself.
Parenting styles are not always dependent on social context. Every family is a different little culture in itself, no matter the socioeconomic status, religion, or nationality. Families that look highly similar from the outside can be run in entirely different fashions.
A child's success is can be encouraged by nuturing parents. A child will succeed when their parents take sincere interest in their success. I'm not even going to go into the vastly different definitions of success that the "Chinese mothers" and "Western mothers" as defined in this article espouse...
I don't honestly see how yelling at or belittling a kid can be beneficial in any way. It will not help their overall personal development. They will get enough of these things from the outside world, there is no reason for them to get it at home as well. Yes, encouraging them to keep working until they get it right is a worthwhile endeavor, and parents who want their children to succeed will ensure that the child does just that. But harsh words are no way to achieve this goal.
I would call my upbringing strict, borderline verbally abusive, but my parents were only driven by what they thought would be best for us. There was a definite drive for success. Everything I did was never perfect, there was always room for improvement. Even a report card with straight A+ grades left my parents with comments like, "you can do better." I responded relatively well to the yelling and focused all of my energy on school. My siblings? Rebelled.
No idea what parenting style I would espouse, but I definitely cringe when I see my sister raise her voice to her children. In her home, everything will be perfect, all homework must be completed ahead of schedule, and friends come second to family time and character-building extracurricular essentials such as piano, karate, and ballet. The stress is high in their home: my niece literally pulls out her hair and my nephew has panic attacks. My sister sees these as little road blocks on a much bigger picture of success. Her kids are top of the class, confident, social, and most likely have the skills necessary to well in life.
When it comes down to it, who really knows what is best when it comes to parenting? It is the subject of study after study, there are hundreds of theories, many unproven. I don't pretend to know what is best, but I definitely don't agree with the parenting methods outlined by the article in the OP.
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"Sometimes I have to remember that things are brought to me for a reason, either for my own lessons or for the benefit of others." Cynthetiq
"violence is no more or less real than non-violence." roachboy
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