Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community - View Single Post - The very complicated lesbian experience for men.

Shauk · 01-07-2011, 03:01 PM

Everyone is confused at some point or another.

Things are getting off to a weird start though. She invited me over, said she'd leave the door open and just to come in when I got there cuz she was going to hop in the shower.

Wanted me to come over and watch movies with her.

Her roommate apparently has been in a relationship for 10 years with the same guy off and on, and was inviting that guy over, who in turn invited 2 of their friends over. So 6 people and a lot of alcohol later I still found myself being very quiet and observant. I couldn't quite grasp my role in this. I felt like the other guys and girls fit the more traditional stereotype of beauty. The "bros" and the pink'd up blonde girls just kind of enjoying their foray into adulthood.

It just felt like a mixed crowd to me, not normally the type I hang out with, I wasn't really sure what to make of it. So of course I sat there in a state of overthinking it all.

Occasionally some of her favorite songs would come on and she would walk over to me and kiss me, and give me a full on lap dance whenever they would leave the room to smoke or something, this went on for hours throughout the night, sometimes they'd walk in on us and make a scene of it, but hey, I couldn't complain really. I only mention it because I feel like it may have set up the awkwardness for me later. I had a rollercoaster in my pants so to speak, up and down.

At some point the 10year couple get in to a bit of a fight, Im already feeling uncomfortable, and my "date" is spending most of her time out on the balcony trying to calm the guy down because he's distraught.

She finally got him calmed down and around 3am she pulled me off the couch in to her room.

She was ready but I just couldn't do it.

I think I was just too nervous, too tired, too drained from the constant ups and downs from before, and still feeling conflicted if this was what she wanted, or a good idea. I did what I could for her as long as it didn't involve anything below MY belt. Part of me worries that my hesitation might mean something is wrong, I dunno, maybe something is wrong. I guess I can talk to her about it at some point but I'm not really sure how to bring it up.

01-07-2011, 03:01 PM	#10 (permalink)
Shauk Confused Adult Location: Spokane, WA	Everyone is confused at some point or another. Things are getting off to a weird start though. She invited me over, said she'd leave the door open and just to come in when I got there cuz she was going to hop in the shower. Wanted me to come over and watch movies with her. Her roommate apparently has been in a relationship for 10 years with the same guy off and on, and was inviting that guy over, who in turn invited 2 of their friends over. So 6 people and a lot of alcohol later I still found myself being very quiet and observant. I couldn't quite grasp my role in this. I felt like the other guys and girls fit the more traditional stereotype of beauty. The "bros" and the pink'd up blonde girls just kind of enjoying their foray into adulthood. It just felt like a mixed crowd to me, not normally the type I hang out with, I wasn't really sure what to make of it. So of course I sat there in a state of overthinking it all. Occasionally some of her favorite songs would come on and she would walk over to me and kiss me, and give me a full on lap dance whenever they would leave the room to smoke or something, this went on for hours throughout the night, sometimes they'd walk in on us and make a scene of it, but hey, I couldn't complain really. I only mention it because I feel like it may have set up the awkwardness for me later. I had a rollercoaster in my pants so to speak, up and down. At some point the 10year couple get in to a bit of a fight, Im already feeling uncomfortable, and my "date" is spending most of her time out on the balcony trying to calm the guy down because he's distraught. She finally got him calmed down and around 3am she pulled me off the couch in to her room. She was ready but I just couldn't do it. I think I was just too nervous, too tired, too drained from the constant ups and downs from before, and still feeling conflicted if this was what she wanted, or a good idea. I did what I could for her as long as it didn't involve anything below MY belt. Part of me worries that my hesitation might mean something is wrong, I dunno, maybe something is wrong. I guess I can talk to her about it at some point but I'm not really sure how to bring it up.