james t kirk

So, your wife has lost her sex drive and she expects you to forgo yours? That's not very nice. I find your post somewhat distressing because I don't want to end up in a situation where my sex drive dries up, or my partner's sex drive dries up. Not good.

A couple of things come to mind.

1. Do you think she could be having an affair? Usually one of the dead give-aways to an affair are sudden changes in behaviour. As much as you might poo-poo the idea of your wife having an affair, I can assure you that it is more common than uncommon. You know the old expression, "I was the last to know." Doing a little detective work may be required.

2. There is something medical going on. Upstairs or down.


You need to discuss your frustration with your wife and tell her that although her sex drive has vanished, yours has not and it's not reasonable or fair for her to expect you to give it up.

If the problem persists and sex is very important to you, well, you then have to make some decisions.

1. Is sex important to you? So important that you can not fathom giving it up? If your answer is you could give it up - problem solved. However, if you can't give it up......

1. Split up. As impossible as this might seem, you need to consider the possibility.

2. Subcontract out that portion of the work. (If you want to stay married, I would recommend the services of a professional and keeping it to yourself - depending on where you live of course.) Discrete subcontracting out of that portion of the work allows you the release you need and keeps your marriage intact. Oh, I'm sure that there are those here who will jump all over me, but I'm just being realistic and being realistic can be a bitch sometimes.